They Don’t Really Have Those On The Menu

(I am with a friend in a Chinese restaurant, close to Chinese New Year. My friend wants to wish the waitress a “happy new year” in Cantonese, so I have been doing my best to teach him the phrase. Neither of us is Chinese, but it has been a simple enough phrase for me to learn.)

Me: “It’s, ‘Gong Hey Fat Choy!’“

Friend: “Hong Kay Fat Koi.”

Me: “What? No… It’s ‘Gong Hey Fat Choy!’“

Friend: “Gong Hey Fat Choy!“

Me: “You got it!”

(The waitress comes over and we order our food as normal. My friend is adorable, bursting with excitement during the whole process about “showing off” his new-found ability to speak four Chinese words.)

Waitress: “Okay, is there anything else I can get you guys?”

Friend: “There is one thing!”

Waitress: “Sure! What would that be?”

Friend: “Hung Gay Frat Boy!“

(My friend beamed a huge smile, incredibly proud of himself.)

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