Don’t Put Melons On Apples

Manager: “Can you set up a new MacBook to be sent to the executive floor, for—”

Me: “—Is it for [Executive Name]?”

Manager: “Uh, yes, actually. Did she call you already?”

Me: “No, but when I was on that floor earlier for another reason and saw her cutting a watermelon sideways, with a bread knife, using her hand to stabilise it, on top of her MacBook, I had a feeling I’d be making a return trip.”

Manager: “…you have my permission to dig out one of the older MacBooks from the basement.”