Don’t Mum-ble

(We’re on holiday with a large group of other families, all friends, and are currently walking round a theme park. My mum has significant hearing loss so we have to make sure we speak clearly. She can lip read very well so the only problem is getting her attention.)

Me: “Hey, Mum?”

(She doesn’t hear me and continues chatting about what we’re doing.)

Me: “Hey, [Mum’s Name]?”

Mum: “Huh? Oh, [My Name], yes?”

(I ask her about our lunch plans, she replies and then goes back to talking. One of my mum’s friends suddenly speaks up.)

Friend: “My god, [Mum’s Name], how can you let your daughter do that?”

Mum: “Do what?”

Friend: “Call you by your first name! it’s so rude!”

(There is a pause and my mums looks at me, clearly annoyed.)

Mum: “[Friend], there are about six ‘Mums’ here, but I’m the only [Mum’s Name]. My hearing aids don’t work too well in places like this, so calling me by my first name is the best way for my kids to get my attention.”

Friend: “But it’s rude!”

Mum: “I don’t tell you how to run your family; don’t tell me how to run mine.”

Friend: *mumbling* “But… rude!”