Don’t Give Starbucks Any Ideas
(After a high school camping trip, we stop at a diner to eat.)
Father: “I think I’m going to have a big cup of java.”
Friend: *excitedly* “Really? You’re really going to have java? Wow!”
Me: “You realize ‘java’ is just coffee, right?”
Friend: “Oh.”
Me: “What did you think it was?”
Friend: “One of those big fancy drinks with all the fruit and umbrellas.”