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Don’t Get A Personal Trainer If You Just Want To Argue

, , , , | Right | February 22, 2022

CONTENT WARNING: This story contains content of a health-related nature. It is not intended as health advice.

I used to work in a gym as a personal trainer. My main customers were those who needed the most help or greatest weight loss. Part of the service was a full meal plan and then a series of exercises for the gym and at home. It works every time if you follow it; I have a picture wall full of success stories.

After a while, I knew who would and wouldn’t stick to the plan. The ones that didn’t always told me one of three things.

  1. A lie; they “somehow” gained weight every week even though they dieted and did all the exercises. (Honest.)
  2. A sob story; they wanted to follow the plan but their hamster got a cold.
  3. It was too hard or they didn’t like being hungry.

Either way, they all gave up and left, never to be seen again. 

[Customer] was an exception; she gave all the excuses but kept coming back. I nearly told her not to bother when she insulted me and my ability in her last blow-up. But she gave another sob story, and I foolishly let her back.

It was weighing day. I wasn’t looking forward to this.

Me: “It looks like you’ve gained this week, not much as last week. Where do you think you struggled this week?”

Customer: “I don’t know. I did all my exercises.”

Me: “How did you get on sticking to the meal plan?”

Customer: “Oh, I’m not sure.”

Me: “Shall we check the food diary?”

Customer: “Well, I guess, but I think I’ve done fine.”

I check the diary: cakes, fast food, pastries, sweets, you name it — all of which are not on her food plan.

Me: “I think I can see the issue here. You can exercise all you want, but if you are not giving your body the right fuel it needs, you won’t lose weight.”

Customer: “I’m allowed a treat now and then, aren’t I?”

Me: “This is a treat every single day if I look at last week’s food. I would say you ate enough calories for eleven days in seven.”

Customer: “There is no way you can tell that.”

Me: “I’ve been doing this for many years. But we can work it out if you like.”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to. I just need a different diet where I can eat these things and lose weight.”

Me: “You can’t eat takeaway, cakes, and deep-fried food every day unless you plan to run a marathon before breakfast.”

Customer: “You just don’t know what you are talking about.”

Me: “I think we are done here. If you can’t follow a simple plan, I am unable to help you. I will refund the rest of the year’s membership fees.”

Customer: “You can’t fire me! My husband won’t give me my weekly treat money if I don’t come to these classes.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you are not benefiting from these sessions, and frankly, your attitude has not been good enough on several occasions.”

Customer: “But you won’t tell him, right?”

Me: “He will probably notice when the direct debit doesn’t go through.”

Customer: “Oh, I will just tell him there is some issue with the bank.”

I didn’t tell her that we also send an email when we cancel any service. I wrote a very descriptive email explaining why she wasn’t welcome here anymore. I didn’t get a response, but I would have loved to hear the conversation that happened afterward.

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