Don’t Do The Crime If You Can’t Tell The Time

(My store has a grocery section, including an aisle of wine and beer. Since, in my state, alcohol cannot be sold before noon on Sundays, during that time the aisle is roped off. A customer comes up to my till at 10 on a Sunday, carrying bottles of wine.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I won’t be able to sell these to you before noon.”

Customer: “What?! Why?”

Me: “It’s state law. Alcohol can’t be sold before noon on Sundays.”

Customer: “But I have to have these for a lunch party! It’s starting soon, and I said I’d bring the wine!”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry, but I can’t sell these now. It’s illegal and my register will reject it if I try to ring it up.”

Customer: “Don’t you understand? I NEED THESE. I will look like a FOOL if I show up at the party without any wine.”

Me: “That’s… not really something I’m able to help with. I can’t break the law for that.”

Customer: “What law? I just want you to sell me wine!”

Me: “Texas state law forbids the sale of alcohol before noon on a Sunday. If you’d like, you can come back after noon and buy the wine then.”

Customer: *suddenly calm* “Fine. I’ll come back later and pay for these then.”

(She then picks up the bottles and starts walking towards the door with them. I call security.)

Security: “Ma’am, you can’t take those without having paid for them.”

Customer: “But she won’t let me pay for them!”

Security: “Alcohol can’t be sold before noon. That doesn’t mean you get to walk out with it.”

Customer: “But I was going to come back and pay for it later!”

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