Don’t Dish It Out If You Can’t Take It

I work in a kind of divey bar, and as such, we have a bit of wiggle room with rude customers. I love it that way.

I am serving a table. From what I can gather, it is a woman, her boyfriend, and a friend of the woman’s. I go to take their orders, and the friend orders a bacon cheeseburger with fries (we offer a choice of fries or salad with most items). The girlfriend orders a bacon cheeseburger, too.

Me: “Would you like fries or salad with that?”

Woman: “Fries.”

Cue her boyfriend looking at her and loudly asking:

Man: “Oh, seriously? Are you sure you want fries?”

He then grabs his stomach and starts shaking it at her in a very obnoxious way. Her friend looks absolutely shocked and the woman looks super humiliated. I just ignore it.

Me: “Yep, fries, no problem!”

I look at the boyfriend.

Me: “What do you want?”

I kid you not, he asks for the exact same thing.

Man: “Can I get a bacon cheeseburger with fries?”

Without skipping a beat I grab my belly, shake it at this guy, and say:

Me: “Oh? Fries? Really? Are you sure?”

The two women absolutely die laughing and the guy goes scarlet and starts yelling.

Man: “Oh, no! I didn’t mean it like that!”

I told him I didn’t care, and I walked away. I got a massive tip from that table!