Doing It The (Foot)Long Way

Customer: “I’d like to order twelves subs for my workers, for pick up around twelve?”

Me: “Okay! Let me write this down.”

Customer: “All right, so, three subs will be turkey, four will be Italian, three will be tuna, one a BLT, and one a veggie. The first turkey is a six-inch; it has provolone cheese. Oh! And one of the Italian subs has provolone, and the BLT has American. Oh, one of the tuna is American, too, but that’s a foot-long. That one has extra onions on it; it’s for [Worker #1]. Can you write everyone’s names on the outside? The BLT has tomatoes on it, and there’s no tomatoes on one of the turkey subs because [Worker #2] is allergic, but she wants olives. Hmm, it looks like [Worker #3] only wants a six-inch, but extra meat. Oh, and can you put green peppers on mine?”

Me: “Okay, hold on. Let’s start over; I’m a little confused. The first turkey, is it six-inch or foot-long?”

Customer: “Foot-long.”

Me: “What toppings do you want on that sub?”

Customer: “American cheese, mustard, green peppers, lettuce, and onions.”

Me: “And who is that sandwich for?”

Customer: “[Worker #4].”

(We repeat this for every sub.)

Me: “Okay, I think I got it all.”

Customer: *scoffs* “Took long enough. That was the easy way?”