Putting The A** Into Asthma

(I have been having asthma attacks on and off for over a year, due to exam stress and some other factors, so I am hyper-vigilant about having my asthma inhaler everywhere. This is before the smoking ban came into clubs and pubs in the UK. I start dancing at a party of my friends. I slowly start to have an asthma attack. I am also completely stone-cold sober. As I drag myself out into the fresh, clean, but cold air that can also be dangerous for asthmatics, I wam scraping along the walls and generally not looking very well. As I stumble through between the bouncers:)

Bouncer: *guffawing* “Had a bit too much to drink, luv?”

(After I let the symptoms pass, after about 20 minutes, using a series of techniques learned over the past year, my 5’4”, 17-year-old self has this to say to two huge bouncers:)

Me: “That was a really dangerous thing to do. I was having an asthma attack that, fortunately for you, I know how to control. But it could have been anyone. My father is a diabetic, and if he went into a hypoglycaemic coma, it would initially look as though he was drunk. I would hate to think that the level of your caring just now would have landed my father in hospital, if not dead. I hope next time you see someone in distress, you consider that they might not necessarily be drunk, and might even go and check on them!”

(At least they had the decency to look shame-faced.)