A New Breed Of Coworker

(My fiancé and I are talking about my coworkers. One is about to have a baby, while the other three are much older, and are acting like expectant grandmothers. I release this wonderful gem from my lips:)

Me: “So [Coworker] is about to pop. [Boss] got a voicemail this morning and was sad because it wasn’t an announcement that the baby had arrived.”

Fiancé: *unenthusiastic* “Okay, cool?”

Me: “Well, [Boss] and [Other Two Coworkers] are past breeding age, so they are excited to grandmother the heck out of the baby.”

Fiancé: *stares at me like I’m crazy* “Past breeding age?”

Me: “Yeah?”

Fiancé: “You mean like menopause, right? Librarians aren’t like cattle. They don’t ship them off to make dog food when they can’t produce more baby librarians.”

Me: “Whatever. Past breeding age.”

Fiancé: “Coworkers are friends, not food!”