Doesn’t Like Rainbow Jewelry

(These two women have been at the jewelry counter for over a half-hour, and I can tell the jewelry lady is very flustered with them. They finally get their order written out and continue shopping, so I go to ask what the problem was.)

Jeweler: “Ugh, they were nuts!”

Me: “What did they want?”

Jeweler: “First, they were looking at these bracelets, but then they decided they didn’t like the rainbows.”

Me: “It took them that long?”

Jeweler: “Well, they were worried that if they got something with rainbows on it then people would think they were gay.”

Me: *sarcastically* “Oh, gosh, what a nightmare that would be.”

(I return to my register, and the women finally come over to ring out. They are very haughty and condescending toward me and talk a lot of trash about the store despite all the stuff they’re buying.)

Me: “Thanks, ladies, have a nice day. And may I just say that you two are really cute together?”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Me: *cheerfully* “You’re just a really cute couple. You go really well together!”

(Scandalized, they gathered up all their merchandise and fled from the store. The moral of this story is, don’t be a homophobic idiot.)