Does Not Work Here, Thinks She Knows Everything

The building I work in opens at 8:15 every weekday. We have two doors: the front door to the street which we keep locked until opening time and the back door to employee parking which the public can use but rarely do. From the first employee coming in, the back door remains unlocked until we close for the day.

One morning, a coworker who works across town comes in through the back door around 8:05, ten minutes before we open. She proudly walks up to our counter with a huge grin on her face.

Coworker: “I bet you’re wondering why it’s so quiet, huh?”

Me: “What?”

Coworker: “I said, I bet you’re wondering why it’s so quiet in here.”

Me: “Well, it usually is this time of day.”

Coworker: “Yeah, want to know why?”

Me: “Why?”

Coworker: “Because your front door is locked.”

Me: “Yes, it is.”

Coworker: “Aren’t you late?”

Me: “Uh, no?”

Coworker: “What? Don’t you open at 8:00?”

Me: “No, we open at 8:15.”

Coworker: “Oh. I guess I could have checked the sign on your door with the hours.”

Me: “Yeah. It’s okay you didn’t know; you don’t work here.”

Coworker: “Yeah… I need coffee!” *Flounces away*

Related:
I Don’t Work Here, DOES Work Here
Used To Work Here Does Not Work Here
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 34