Does Not Register How To Use The Register

, , , , , | Right | April 29, 2019

(Our card reader does take chip cards, but it’s a very persnickety thing and if you do things in the wrong order, it will either ignore you completely or force you to start over.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, before you chip it, just confirm the amount—“

Customer: “I know how to do it!”

(She jams her card into the chip reader. It gives an angry buzzing noise.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, please take your card out of the chip reader and press the green circle on the screen.”

(Ignoring me, she jams the green circle on the keypad.)

Me: “Ma’am, you have to take your card out, press the circle on the screen, and put the card back in.”

Customer: “I know how to do it!”

(She jabs the circle on the screen but doesn’t take her card out. The reader proceeds to ignore her card in the slot and instructs her to swipe or chip her card.)

Customer: “Why does it say to swipe or chip?! It’s already in there!”

Me: “Ma’am, this machine is very persnickety. You need to take your card out and start over.”

Customer: “No, I don’t! I know how to use these things!”

(The card reader times out, meaning we now have to start over. I press the appropriate buttons.)

Me: “Take your card out and press the green circle on the screen. Then put your card back in.”

(The woman pulls her card out, then jams it back in before pressing the green circle. Since she didn’t press the green circle first, the machine buzzes at her.)

Customer: “Why is this so hard? I know how to use these things!”

Me: *annoyed* “Ma’am, please listen to the instructions–“

Customer: “This is bulls***! You do it, then!”

(She throws her card down on the counter. I sigh, turn the scanner toward me, and press the green button. It chimes happily and I put her card in. In seconds, her card is authorized and I take her card out and hand it to her.)

Me: “Now you just need to sign using the stylus and press the green circle on the screen again…”

(She jabs the screen viciously with her finger and rubs back and forth.)

Customer: “Why isn’t it working?!”

Store Manager: *who has been nearby, watching* “Because you can’t seem to follow directions. Use. The. Stylus. And press the green circle on the screen.”

(The woman finally grabs the stylus, scribbles incomprehensibly on the screen, and jams the stylus back into its holder. I sigh and pick up the stylus, pressing the green button. The persnickety machine is finally happy; it chimes again and the woman’s receipt prints up.)

Customer: “I know how to use these things!”

Me & Store Manager: *as she flounces out* “No… You clearly don’t.”

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