Does Not Have A License To Kill Licenses

, , , | Legal | August 2, 2018

(I am buying cigarettes and the worker asks for ID. I’m short for my age so I’m used to people having to check.)

Clerk: “Sorry, but your ID is fake.”

Me: “What? What do you mean?”

Clerk: “This is a fake ID. It’s pink.”

(The thing is, not only is it a legitimate ID, but I have just come straight from the courthouse from renewing it. For some reason the new driver’s licenses are now pink with “FL” across them. I try to reason with him.)

Me: “No, that’s brand new. Look, I even have the receipt for it.” *shows paper*

(The clerk looks at it and laughs.)

Clerk: “Nice try, but it’s too shiny. See? No scratches.”

Me: “I just told you it’s brand new. That’s the license now. I don’t write the laws. The new license has a pink banner.”

(Ignoring me, the little s*** cuts my license up! I pay for gas, ignore his asinine smile, and head back to the courthouse. But guess who gets pulled over on the way there?)

Cop: “License and registration?”

Me: “Well, officer. How about a receipt for a license? And while we’re at it, can you come with me to that gas station?”

(I thought the gas station rep was going to pee his pants when he saw the trooper come with me to the window!)

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