Do NOT Piss Off The Strawberry

(I lived in Germany for about three years when I was younger, and was taught in the German school system. Due to this, I am fluent in German. I am in science class and the people near me are being quite loud. It should be noted that I am a small sophomore, only about five feet tall, and there are four girls including me. The rest of the class consists of large, loud, junior and senior boys.)

Boy #1: “Did you hear about the football game yesterday? It was EPIC!”

Boy #2: “Haha, yeah. [Team] was CRUSHED!”

Me: “Hey, guys, we’re supposed to be doing the worksheet.”

Boy #3: “Hey, who wants to hear my best pickup line?”

Teacher: “[Boy #3]! Please be quiet and let the other students work!”

(They, of course, ignore the teacher and proceed to get increasingly louder. Since I don’t curse or generally draw much attention to myself, I am getting fed up.)

Boy #4: “Hey, hey, [Boy #3]! Can you send my girlfriend a good pickup line? She’s mad at me.”

Boy #3: “Whoo! Of course! C’mon, help me think of one!”

(The room explodes. I stand up.)

Me: “IHR SEIT ALLE ERDBEEREN!”

(In case you haven’t heard someone speak German before, it is a harsh, scary-sounding language, especially when yelled. The room falls silent.)

Boy #1: “Pretty sure she just screamed the f-word at us…”

Me: “No, I called you strawberries. Now get to work.”