Divorcing Yourself From The Blame

(It’s Monday morning and I ring my boss.)

Me: “Morning, [Boss]. I just wanted to let you know we’re running very low on change.”

Boss: “I thought there was about £120 in the till?”

Me: “There is, but £100 is in twenties, and the rest in small silver. No pound coins, no fives, no tens; I can’t give change.”

Boss: *furious* “How did this happen? Why was it left like this? Why wasn’t I told?!”

Me: “No idea, I’ve been on holiday for the past week. This is my first day back.”

Boss: *even more cross* “I should have been informed; this shouldn’t have happened!! Who worked the last shift?!”

Me: “Your wife…”

Boss: *pause* “Okay, tell me what you need.”