Dispensing Bad Advice

(I have ordered three large beverage dispensers online to be delivered to my local store. They’re perfect for my upcoming wedding and they’re on sale for a really cheap price, so I’m excited about them. I get the notification that they’re ready for pickup, and go to pick them up. The employee brings out one box, and it’s obvious that there’s only one item in it. She tells me that the system says they are all supposed to be in the same box, so we’re missing two. She gives me the option to get a refund on the missing two, or call the customer service line to have them re-sent. I really want them, so I opt to call customer service. The following conversation happens over the phone.)

Employee: “Thank you for calling. How can I help you?”

Me: “Hi. I ordered three of the same item but the store only received one, and their computer said they were supposed to be in the same box.”

Employee: *a brief pause as she considers what I’ve said* “What? They were in the same box?”

Me: “No, the computer said they were but there was only one in the box. I’m missing two.”

Employee: “May I please have the order number and I’ll look it up for you.”

Me: “Sure, it’s [order number].”

(At this point she starts reading everything on her computer out loud to herself, and just generally mumbling. I can’t understand what she’s saying so I just wait for her to finish reading.)

Employee: “Okay, it says here everything was delivered today.”

Me: “Right, but the order wasn’t complete. Only part of it actually arrived. The system thinks it was all in the same box but it wasn’t.”

Employee: “Okay, let me see if I can replace them for you.”

(Pleased that she finally understands, I wait as she mumbles and reads everything from her screen again.)

Employee: “Okay, I can’t do the return over the phone. You’ll have to return to the store for a refund.”

Me: “But I don’t want a refund. I want the items. You can’t replace them?”

Employee: *suddenly, in a panicked, screaming voice as if I just called her a liar* “NO. The computer won’t let me! That’s what the prompt says! It says to tell you that you have to go to the store!”

Me: *not convinced she really knows what she’s doing* “Um, okay, is there someone you can transfer me to that might know how? A supervisor or anyone? I really want the items.”

Employee: “NO, IT SAYS I CAN’T! YOU HAVE TO GO TO THE STORE! YOU HAVE TO GET A REFUND!”

(I’ve never hung up on anyone before, but there was no sign of either of us getting what we wanted, and the more she spoke the more she just kept screaming that the computer won’t let her. Guess I have another trip to the store to make.)