Discounted Hell To Pay

(I work for a company that sells musical equipment. I am taking a call from an older gentleman who tells me that he is a priest. He has been very nice for the duration of the call, and we are almost finished placing his order.)

Priest: “Now, could you give me 15% off on this? You would be doing the Lord’s work if you could get me 15% off my order!”

Me: “Well, I don’t think I have a 15% off coupon, right now. I’ll check and see.”

(I put him on hold, and check my available coupons. There is only a 10% coupon. I return to the customer with this.)

Me: “So, I couldn’t get you 15% off. I do have a 10% coupon, though!”

Priest: “Child, do you what to go to Hell?!”

(I am taken aback.)

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Priest: “Hell, Child. If you don’t give me 15% off my order, your soul will rot in Hell for all eternity!”

Me: “I’m a red-head, sir; I don’t have to worry about that. Now, is there anything else I can add to your order today?”