Dealing With These Monsters Requires A Sprite Touch

I am a shift manager. A customer pulls up to the speaker in the drive-thru and gives my crew member a hard time about her coupon. This coupon is two combo meals for $8.99 (plus tax). She also wants to add two twenty-ounce drinks, which are another $1.79 each.

The customer is yelling and complaining about the price. My crew member (in tears!) comes to me and asks me to deal with her. It’s the middle of the lunch rush and I am protective of my crew members – don’t make them cry! I approach the window.

Me: “I’m the manager. What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “Why is it almost $15?! The coupon is for $8.99 and I know extra drinks ain’t cost that much!”

Me: “There is a 6% sales tax on everything. The coupon itself even says so. Also, it looks like you requested to add cheese, which is an additional $0.50 per sandwich, and you wanted to go heavy on all the toppings on one, which is an additional $0.60. Also, those additional drinks added around $3.50 to your bill, as well. That’s why it’s not $8.99.”

Customer: “Okay, fine, take off one of the drinks.”

Me: “Okay, so your total is now [over $12].”

Customer: “Seriously? Okay, fine, take off the other one, too.”

Me: “All right, so your total is now [over $10].”

Customer: “It’s $8.99.”

Me: “There’s still a tax, ma’am. Also, the extra cheese and toppings you wanted are adding an additional dollar or so to your bill.”

Customer: “Fine!”

She takes forever to dig up change and the line is growing behind her. I hand her food over and the drinks that came with her coupon bundle.

Me: “Have a good day.”

Customer: “Where’s my other Sprite?”

Me: “You took it off, remember? The coupon came with two drinks so you have your two Sprites.”

Customer: “GIVE ME MY SPRITE! I PAID FOR IT!”

I print out another receipt, showing her that she is wrong.

Me: “You didn’t pay for it.”

Customer: “GIVE ME MY SPRITE!”

Me: “I can’t do that for you unless you pay for it.”

Customer: “GIVE ME MY SPRITE!”

Me: “You already got your two drinks that came with the coupon. You didn’t pay for additional drinks, remember?”

Customer: “GIVE ME MY F****** SPRITE SO I CAN GET THE F*** OUT OF HERE!”

We lock eyes and stare into each other’s souls for what feels like an eternity. Cars behind her are honking. Suddenly, I have an idea.

Me: “Okay one second.”

I pour a carbonated water, which looks identical to Sprite.

Me: “ENJOY YOUR FREE DRINK!”

I slam the window shut and she drives off.

I know it’s petty, and normally, I wouldn’t have done something like this, but I promise you she deserved it.

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