Dating A Hick

(My girlfriend loves it when I pay attention to her neck, but it’s coming into summer and she’s asked that I refrain from giving her hickeys so she doesn’t have to cover them for work. As it’s my birthday, and I like to give them, she tells me I’m allowed to leave one on her neck that must fade within a week. However, we end up having a very passionate morning and it leads to this exchange when we’re in the bathroom later.)

Girlfriend: *checking neck in the mirror* “You know how I said you could leave one hickey?”

Me: “Of course.”

Girlfriend: “Then why do I have several on each side of my neck? As in, I have a plural amount!”

Me: “Because you kept grabbing my head and trying to suffocate me with your neck.”

Girlfriend: “That doesn’t mean you had to leave a hickey there!”

Me: “Well if you just want one, hold still. I’ll connect the dots.”