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Death Goes Shopping

Extras

Hear Her Evil, See Her Evil, Speak Her Evil

| USA | Bad Behavior, Health & Body, Top, Wild & Unruly

(One of my coworkers has partial hearing loss in her right ear, and has a medical condition that has caused her to lose almost all of her peripheral vision in her right eye. On this day, she’s putting away a cartload of items and just happens to be working directly under a speaker. A customer approaches her from the right, and speaks very, very softly.)

Customer: *very softly* “Excuse me; where are your bedsheets?”

Coworker: *doesn’t hear her and keeps working*

Customer: “Excuse me? EXCUSE ME?!”

(Suddenly, the customer KICKS my coworker in the hip. The kick is so hard that my coworker has to catch herself so she doesn’t fall over.)

Customer: “How DARE you ignore me?!”

Coworker: “I’m terribly sorry, ma’am! I didn’t see you.”

Customer: “Bulls***! I was standing right here! Everyone has peripheral vision!”

Coworker: “Except for people with vision problems, ma’am. Can I help you?”

Customer: “Then you should’ve heard me!”

Coworker: “I also have partial hearing loss, and that…” *points up at the ceiling* “…is a speaker.”

Customer: “Well, you should be checking every direction for customers every five seconds!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, is there something I can help you with? I don’t actually work on the sales floor; I work in the stock room, and I have to get back…”

(My coworker ends up helping the customer and taking her to the bedsheets section. However, later I hear the customer complaining to my manager.)

Customer: “…and she just ignored me! And then she kicked me and called me a b****!”

Manager: “I’m so, so so sorry! I’ve never seen her act like that.”

Me: “…Sir?”

Manager: “Not now.”

Me: “But I witnessed the incident.”

Customer: *goes pale* “I didn’t see you anywhere nearby!”

Me: “I was ten feet away, in the clothing racks. Ma’am, YOU kicked HER when you thought she was ignoring you and yelled at her.”

Manager: *lightbulb goes on* “She was on [Coworker]’s right, wasn’t she?”

Me: “Yes, sir.”

Manager: *to the customer* “Well, ma’am, under these circumstances I can’t give you any discounts, nor will I. I’m not giving you anything for free, and I’m going to call corporate myself to tell them what happened. I’ve got video cameras and an employee witness. You assaulted one of my associates. Get out of my store!”

(The customer did try to call corporate. When they hung up on her, she called the cops, who reviewed the tape and nearly arrested her!)

Acting Hypertext

| Denver, CO, USA | Bad Behavior, Bizarre, Theme Of The Month

(I take escalated calls for a major cell phone provider.)

Caller: “My son received a text from a wrong number, so I had his number changed. The lady I was speaking to waived the $15 fee, but we had to program the new number in, so I want a $50 credit.”

(Note: it was one text asking for class notes, sent to the wrong number.)

Me: “I apologize that you received a text from a wrong number, and I’m glad we could help, but we can’t give a credit for programming a phone.”

Caller: *high-pitched, unintelligible, wordless shrieking*

Me: “Ma’am, please stop yelling at me.”

Caller: *shrieking doubles in volume*

Me: “Ma’am, this is solving nothing.”

Caller: *starts growling*

Me: “Ma’am, I’m going to disconnect this call of you keep treating me this way. I don’t appreciate being yelled at.”

Caller: *calmly* “I’d like to speak to your supervisor.”

(Later…)

Supervisor: “Thanks for that call. I had to hang up on her. That was fun!”