Archive for 2013

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A Pleasing Surprise

| Wildwood, NJ, USA | Right | December 13, 2013

(I am the customer in this story. I am on a camping trip at a boardwalk. I approach an ice cream stand.)

Me: “Hi! Could I please have a cone of mint ice cream?”

Cashier: “Sure— Wait. Did you say please?”

Me: “Um. Yes?”

Cashier: “Wow! I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone else say please!”

(The cashier turns to a coworker.)

Cashier: “Hey, [Coworker]. Have you?”

Coworker: “I don’t think so. Maybe only kids.”

Cashier: “Thanks! Here’s your ice cream! Have a good day!”

Me: “Thank you! You, too!”

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Showing Devilish Customers How It’s Done

| AK, USA | Right | December 13, 2013

(A particularly angry customer comes through my line. Despite my best and calmest efforts to help, she begins to yell at me in front of the whole line. Among other things, she calls me names, says I don’t deserve to be alive, and then tries to punch me on the top of my head. I have to spend a full twenty minutes in the break room to try and calm down. One of my coworkers has witnessed the whole thing. The very next day, the customer returns, acting like nothing has happened. My coworker suddenly stands in front of customer.)

Coworker: “Ma’am, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

Customer: “What?! Why?”

Coworker: “Because yesterday you yelled at and assaulted one of my coworkers until she cried. I believe that’s grounds for a ban from the store. Please get out.”

Customer: *growing angry* “You can’t do that, you brat!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, three minutes’ worth of security footage and several witnesses says I CAN do that. You will not be welcome here any longer. Leave.”

Customer: “You can just go to H***, you—”

Coworker: “I went there once. Now I RULE it. Now GET OUT OF OUR STORE.”

(By this time three of the managers have arrived to back him up and escort the customer out. She screamed for a little while longer but eventually left, and never came back!)

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A Rather Surprising Problem To Address

| OH, USA | Right | December 13, 2013

Me: “May I please have your address?”

Customer: *confused* “Is that… on my bill somewhere?”

Me: “It’s usually on the front of your house.”

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Quick To Find Fault With Being Quick To Finding Fault

| Manchester, England, UK | Right | December 13, 2013

Me: “Hello. IT Help Desk. [My Name] speaking. How can I help?”

Caller: “Yes. I logged a job the other day. It’s been resolved already, so I’d just like to close it.”

(I proceed to take the reference number. I load the job up, thinking this will be a quick and easy call.)

Me: “Okay. That’s all sorted for you. Is there anything else I can do for you today?”

Caller: “Yes. I’d just like to ask. When I phoned the other day and logged this fault, someone came and fixed it five minutes later.”

Me: “Well I’m… glad to hear that?”

Caller: “No, but—why, when I wasted all that time trying to get through to you, did no one tell me it had already been logged?”

Me: “Unfortunately, ma’am, we have a dozen staff taking hundreds of calls from thousands of users. If you tell us there’s a fault to log we can only take your word for it.”

(This clearly wasn’t the right answer. The user gets more and more agitated.)

Caller: “Yes, but, don’t you keep track of these things? Can’t you keep track of all these jobs? Why couldn’t someone have told me?”

Me: “Ma’am, if you’d told us you didn’t know whether or not it was logged, we could’ve investigated. We could have spent time trying to ascertain if a call had already been made to us regarding the issue. We certainly couldn’t do that as a routine matter for every call we receive.”

Caller: “I just don’t understand why the person I spoke to didn’t know! My time is very valuable. I’m a very busy person. I wasted a lot of time on that call!”

(This goes back and forth for a while. We’re reaching the 10 minute mark.)

Me: “I can only apologise again that we were unaware your fault had already been logged before you called. However, with all due respect, you didn’t know either. It is your printer. Also, even if we had told you, your complaint was about the length of time it took you to get through. It was time you would’ve wasted whether or not we logged your duplicate call. Finally, ma’am, your complaint is that you wasted your valuable time speaking to IT unnecessarily. Yet you’ve been going around in circles about this with me for 10 minutes now. I’m sorry, but I don’t know how else to answer your question. I am happy to hear that we were able to resolve your issue so quickly, though.”

Caller: *click*

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Customer Service Is Not At Your Service

| Seattle, WA, USA | Working | December 13, 2013

(My boyfriend and I have just walked into a coffee shop that is quite busy.)

Manager: “I’ll be with you guys in just a minute.”

Me: “Okay!”

(The manager turns away from my boyfriend and me, to his employees.)

Manager: “So corporate is making a big deal about stepping up our customer service this year. We are offering a survey. If customers fill it out then they get specials and such sent to them. We really want to stress this year how important our customers are…”

(The manager goes on like this for several minutes, the entire time stressing how important their customer service is. Finally, another employee finishes making several drinks for other people and comes over to take our drink orders.)

Employee #1: “Sorry about the wait guys. What can I get for you?”

Me: “It’s no problem. I will have [drink] and my boyfriend will have a [other drink].”

Employee #1: “No problem. That’ll be [total]. It’ll be just a minute before its ready.”

Me: “Okay.”

Employee #1: “Hey, [Manager]. Can you please make these two their drinks while I get the line down?”

Manager: “Sure! It’ll be just a minute, guys.”

Me: “No problem!”

(To my surprise, the manager turns away from us again and starts talking to his employees, still stressing the importance of extra good customer service. Once again a different employee steps in to make our drinks. At this point we have been in the store for nearly 15 minutes.)

Employee #2: “I am so sorry about the wait, you guys. Here are your drinks.”

Me: “It’s no problem at all!”

(My boyfriend and I had a good laugh about being ignored repeatedly by a man explaining how important good customer service is.)

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