(My coworker is Mexican, but has very fair skin. Our store has more than 60,000 item numbers. While the employees who work in certain sections know the products and the numbers in their area, cashiers have to look the numbers up in the computer.)

Customer: “Hi. I was wondering what the price on this item is.”

Coworker: “Of course. Let me just look up the number for you.”

Customer: *to her friend in Spanish* “Can you believe this dumb b****? Can’t even tell me the price for this stupid thing.”

Coworker: *in Spanish* “The price for that is [price]. Can I help you with anything else?”

(The customer turned white and quickly walked away!)

(I teach English to high school kids in the middle of nowhere in Japan. Their English ability can lead to confusion.)

Student: “[My Name]! Go to Hell!”

Me: “What? [Student], that is so rude. You can’t say that to a teacher!”

Student: *looking horrified* “Sorry, sorry, sorry! Umm. Let’s go to Hell together!”

(It’s towards the end of the lunch rush. I am washing dishes in the back of our café. I overhear an exchange between a customer and a coworker.)

Customer: *very politely* “Could I have a vegetarian pastie, please?”

Coworker: “I’m very sorry, but I’ve just sold the last one.”

Customer: “So, there’s no vegetarian pasties?”

Coworker: “No, I’m sorry. But maybe you’d like to try—”

Customer: “FINE! I GUESS I’LL JUST F****** STARVE THEN!” *storms out*

(My friend’s son has gotten in trouble for swearing.)

Friend: “What did you say?”

Son: “No! Can’t say that.”

Friend: “Okay. What letter did it start with?”

Son: “It was the g-word!”

Friend: “The g-word? Spell it.”

Son: “G-O-B!”

Friend: “Is that really all you said? The punishment seems a bit harsh.”

Son: “Yeah. I only told the teacher to ‘shut her f****** gob’ and I got in trouble!”

(I work at a grocery store. I have just finished ringing up a customer who bought a few food items and some plants.)

Me: “Okay. That will be [amount].”

Customer: “Do you think I should get paper or plastic for my plant?”

Me: “Either one will work, ma’am. Which one would you prefer?”

Customer: “You’re just a sourpuss. Aren’t you?”

Me: “I’m sorry. What are you saying?”

Customer: “You’re such a sourpuss. I just asked you a simple question. You’re being so rude to me!”

(The customer grunts and walks over to the customer service desk. I overhear her talking to my manager.)

Customer: “That girl over there is a SOURPUSS! A SOURPUSS, I TELL YOU!”

(The manager comes back and delivers the items to the customer. She walks out the door with a sneer on her face.)

Customer: *screaming as she leaves* “SOURPUSS!”