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Server, Serve Thyself

, | Lincolnshire, England, UK | Working | September 27, 2013

(I’ve spent the last six years working in various different fast food companies. I’m extremely well known for how happy and polite I am at all times, something that always raises questions with coworkers and customers alike. My coworker is notorious for being miserable and moody to everyone she meets.)

Coworker #1: “Hey, how come you’re so nice to everyone all the time?”

Me: “Ha, you say it like it’s a bad thing!”

Coworker #1: “Oh no! But seriously though; you’re even nice to the bad ones! There’s got to be a reason for it!”

Me: “I don’t know, really. Well, I do remember something that’s always stuck with me. One day, when I was about six years old, I was queuing at a fast food place on my own. I reached the front of the queue and the cashier asked me if she could serve the man behind me. Being a kid and not really understanding, I let her. She then did this a further four times and completely ignored me until my mum noticed and stepped up. The cashier didn’t even apologize. Even though I’m now 22, this occurrence still bugs me to this day, so I guess I vowed to never be like that if I could help it!”

Coworker #1: “I wish I had a tragic fast food back story to make me a better worker too!”

Me: “You don’t need one. It’s not hard to smile at someone!”

Coworker: “Ugh, but I hate it here, and I hate having to serve them!”

Me: “Okay… Just think of it like this: how do you react when someone serves you in a shop and they don’t smile at you or ask you how you are, and continue talking to their coworkers the whole time?”

Coworker #1: “Well, I complain about it of course! People should be happy to serve others and do their job!”

Me: “Exactly. Maybe you should try smiling some time too then maybe customers will stop complaining about you.”

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Vegetarianism Versus Feminism

| CA, USA | Working | September 27, 2013

(I have taken my two young children to a popular family restaurant chain. My eight-year-old daughter is vegetarian. She orders a kids’ meal that comes with either bacon or sausage, and she plans to give the meat to her five-year-old brother, so she asks him what he would prefer.)

Sister: “Hey [brother’s name], bacon or sausage with my [kids’ meal]?”

Brother: “Bacon.”

Server: “Honey, you don’t have to let him order you around and tell you what you should eat just because he is a boy. What do you want to eat?”

Sister: “I am a vegetarian, so I am going to give the bacon to my brother.”

Server: “That’s just awful. You don’t have to give him anything just because he is a boy. You can eat all your meal if you want.”

Me: *losing patience* “Please bring my daughter’s [kid’s meal] with bacon. We’ll figure it out from there.”

Server: *to me* “I can’t believe that in this day and age a mother can be so sexist! How can you allow your son to boss around his older sister? That is just awful.”

Me: “My daughter is a vegetarian. She does not eat meat. She can choose to do whatever she wants with the part of the meal she doesn’t want to eat. Now please go and place our order, and I would like to talk to your manager.”

Server: “Fine.”

(She walks away mumbling.)

Server: “Shameless. Making a girl give up the best part of her food. Just shameless.”

(The manager never shows up, and while we like the restaurant chain, we are not going to that particular location again.)

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Ladders And Tall Guys And Bears, Oh My

| USA | Working | September 27, 2013

(The employee helping me is quite tall.)

Me: “Could you get me these shoes in a size 10 from those shelves up there?”

Employee: “Yeah, no problem. Stand back a bit; I don’t want any boxes to fall on you.”

Me: “Okay…?” *steps back*

(The employee grabs the bottom box in a stack of 8 or 10 and attempts to balance the entire stack while getting them down. They fall with a loud crash. The manager sticks her head into the aisle and sees us picking shoes up.)

Manager: “What just happened?”

Me: “There was a bear.”

Employee: “A big ol’ grizzly.”

Me: “He’s gone now.”

Manager: *sighs* “Just get the ladder next time.”

Employee: *sing song voice* “Somebody’s getting a discount on their shoes!”

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Acting Zodi-Whack

| Finland | Working | September 27, 2013

(I am fixing the layout of a page with a coworker.)

Coworker #1: “So, how does this look to you? Should we have those speech bubbles or not?”

Me: “I don’t know. I can’t make any decisions. I am Pisces!”

Coworker #1: “Well who can make them, as I am Pisces too. How about [Coworker #2]?”

Coworker #2: “Oh yes, I am a balanced Libra. Sure you want me to decide it?”

Coworker #3: “How about a lively Gemini?”

Coworker #4: “No, you definitely need a strong Taurus.”

Coworker #5: “What is this fuss?”

Me: “We two are in charge of this page, and both are Pisces. We can’t decide.”

Coworker #5: “Well I’m Pisces too, so can’t help you. Sorry.”

Coworker #1: “That’s alright as long as a bullish Capricorn doesn’t show up.”

Coworker #6: “Well I’m a bullish Aries.”

Me: “One could definitely use a Virgo now.”

Coworker #5: “HOW RIGHT YOU ARE!”

Bone Achingly Lazy Versus Bone Breakingly Crazy

| Working | September 27, 2013

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