Archive for 2013

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Don’t Answer That

| Right | October 7, 2013


Excess Baggage

| Right | October 7, 2013


Young Customers Themed Giveaway Roundup

, | Not Always Right | Right | October 7, 2013

Young Customers Themed Giveaway Roundup! Here’s a final roundup of stories from last month’s themed giveaway!

  1. Sea Of Electricity (2,676 thumbs up)
  2. The Bald And The Beautiful (2,403 thumbs up)
  3. Ballerina Rex (2,249 thumbs up)
  4. Although He Uses A Lot Of Ranch (2,609 thumbs up)
  5. Polite Touch (2,607 thumbs up)

PS #1: check out our Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

Give A God A Loan

| Waupaca, WI, USA | Working | October 7, 2013

(I am applying for an auto loan, and there are some blanks in the application that can’t be filled in, since I am a preacher.)

Loan Officer: “What should I put on this line for ‘supervisor?'”

Me: “I don’t actually have one. I’m considered self-employed.”

Loan Officer: “I’ll think of something.”

(When I get home, a message is on my answering machine.)

Answer Machine: “Hello, this is [Name] from auto loans, calling about an employee of yours named [My Name]. His loan application says he works for ‘Lord God Almighty.’ Please have your human resources call me at this number to verify his employment status.”

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Their Device Passed The Acid Test

| USA | Working | October 7, 2013

(My brother’s Playstation 2 is having mechanical issues with the disk tray. Fortunately, there is a store nearby that is certified to fix it, and we take it in. Not two hours later, my mother receives a phone call screaming that we need to come pick up the unfixed system immediately.)

Mom: “Hi, we were just called about my son’s Playstation.”

Manager: “Yes, just a moment.”

(He looks very mad as he goes to the back and brings out the Playstation. It is wrapped all the way around with several layers of plastic wrap, with a big sign taped to the top reading ‘LIVE ANIMALS.’)

Manager: “Ma’am, were you aware your son hid live cockroaches in this before bringing it in? When my employee unscrewed the case they jumped right out at him! Because of this, we are banning you from the store. Please never come back.”

(My mom is obviously annoyed, but doesn’t argue. We take the system home and my mom un-wraps the system herself. She takes off the casing that they never bothered to screw back down. Finding nothing, she decides to go back the next day, but leaves my brother and me at home. Miraculously, she comes back with a brand new system straight out of the box.)

Me: “Mom, what happened?”

Mom: “That stupid manager didn’t realize his employee was high on acid, and hallucinated cockroaches coming out of the system. So for being a rude a**-hat, he gave me a new Playstation!”

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