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A Time For Giving And Receiving

| Related | December 24, 2013

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Christmas Pot-Luck

| OH, USA | Related | December 24, 2013

(My family and I are in a candle shop in the local mall around Christmas time. I am about 14.)

Dad: “Hey, come and smell this candle!”

(I walk over to where he is standing, and sniff the candle he is holding in his hand. It has a rather sharp, rank smell to it, and I look at him with a rather disgusted look on my face.)

Dad: “Smells like pot doesn’t it?”

Me: “Yes, kind of interesting for a Christmas candle.”

Dad: “Wait. How do you know what it smells like?”

(I only know the smell because someone that rode my bus had some, and as I had never seen the stuff before, he offered to let me smell it.)

Me: “Well… wait, how do you know? That isn’t grass on that plate in the family photo album is it?”

Dad: “I don’t know what you are talking about!”

I Can Feel Your Presents

| UK | Related | December 24, 2013

(For Christmas, I want a light-saber so I can duel my older sister, who had one from her birthday earlier in the year. My mum goes into a comic book store to get it for me.)

Mum: “Can I get a light-saber?”

Worker: “Sure, you want a boy-sized one or a man-sized one?”

Mum: “I want a man-sized one. For my daughter.”

Do You Feel What I Feel?

| New Zealand | Related | December 24, 2013

(I’m at my parents for dinner. My mother and I are drinking red wine.)

Me: “I can’t drink much more of this, it makes me feel sleepy.”

Mum: “Oh, that’ll be the sedatives!”

Me: “WHAT?!”

Mum: “Oh, I mean the same sort of things that are in turkey. They are the ones that make you feel drowsy! It’s why you shouldn’t have red wine and turkey on Christmas Day; it makes you go to sleep!”

Me: “Depending on the family, that’s not a bad way to spend Christmas.”

A Glass-Half-Full Kinda Guy

| Canada | Related | December 24, 2013

(It is Christmas Eve. Everyone has had a few drinks, and is very giggly and silly.)

Mom: “Okay, I don’t think you’re allowed to have any more wine.”

Dad: “Aww! Fine, I’ll have scotch!”

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