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The Cake Buyer Is A Lie

| MI, USA | Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers, Money

(I work in the deli right beside the bakery. I witness an exchange between a customer and the bakery supervisor.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I need to pick up a cake order. It should be under [name].”

Supervisor: “Sure, let me go get it.”

(She goes into the cooler to retrieve the cake, and brings it out to the customer.)

Supervisor: “Okay, ma’am. Here it is.”

Customer: “Oh, by the way, I already paid for the cake when I ordered it. So I can just walk out with it, right?”

Supervisor: “Well, I don’t see a receipt with your order slip ma’am. Do you happen to have one with you? We usually ask for the receipt to be returned to us so that we know you paid for it.”

Customer: “No! No one told me that I had to do that! But I already paid for it!”

Supervisor: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but everyone who works here knows that we always ask for a receipt to be returned to us. If you don’t have a receipt, I’m afraid you’re going to have to pay for this now.”

Customer: “I told you that I already paid for this cake!”

(The customer waves a slip of paper in the air.)

Customer: “I HAVE THIS! I HAVE THIS!”

Supervisor: “Ma’am, that paper you’re waving around just means we took your order. It does not mean that you paid for it.”

Customer: “I HAVE THIS! I HAVE THIS! IT SHOULD BE GOOD ENOUGH!”

Supervisor: “That slip of paper just means you placed an order with us. It doesn’t prove that you already paid for your cake. Anyone who places an order with us could bring that slip of paper back, lie and say they already paid for their order. I’m not saying that’s what you’re doing, but I can’t just let you leave with this cake without proof of purchasing it.”

Customer: *leaves in a huff without the cake*

Related:
The Cake Is A Lie, Part 4
The Cake Is A Lie, Part 3
The Cake Is A Lie, Part 2

Look Into Your Heart You Know It To Be True

| Lexington, KY, USA | At The Checkout, Love/Romance, Movies & TV, Theme Of The Month, Top

(I’m checking out my items at the front of a store, when a couple bursts in. The girlfriend is clearly upset at her boyfriend.)

Girlfriend: “You really expect me to be all right with you hanging out with your friends on our one-year anniversary?!”

Boyfriend: “It’s been a tradition of my friends to do this for over six years! I can take you out any weekend, but [name of his friend] only gets his brother’s VHS copy of the original Star Wars movies once a year, and so we have a marathon! Come on! It has all the original scenes and characters before Lucas screwed it up!”

Girlfriend: “You all are such nerds! Who cares about the changes! If anything, it made the movies better!”

Boyfriend: “You haven’t even seen the movies!”

Girlfriend: “No real girl has! I haven’t, and…” *points at me* “…she hasn’t! Fine! Go ahead with your stupid marathon! I don’t care anymore! Do whatever the h*** you want!”

(The girlfriend storms down an aisle.)

Me: *imitating Admiral Ackbar* “It’s a trap!” *imitating C-3PO* “Let the girlfriend win.”

(Not only did the boyfriend crack up, but the check-out guy gave me his number!)

Don’t Buy This, Brad Pitt

Extras

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