Archive for 2013

Jump to page:

Screaming In My Face

Extras

image

A Cursory Attitude To Cursing

| MI, USA | Books & Reading, Language & Words

(A couple walk into my store.)

Me: “Hi, can I help you find anything?”

Woman: “Yes, we’re looking for the book Go the F**k to Sleep.”

Me: “I think I have that right back here.”

Man: “Honey, I think ‘go the F to sleep” is the polite way to say that.”

Me: “No worries. If I’m selling it, I should be able to hear it.

Man: “Touché.”

A-Meow-Rica

| Noblesville, IN, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals

(I am a customer at a pet store purchasing a dog harness. It is actually for my cat, who is too big for a cat harness.)

Cashier: “What a cute harness! What kind of dog do you have?”

Me: “It’s for my cat. She’s a Maine Coon.”

(The customer behind me overhears.)

Customer: “You can’t buy that! It’s for a dog!”

Me: “I know, but it will fit my cat.”

Customer: “That harness is for dogs only! D-O-G-S!”

Me: “But the cat harnesses are too small. My cat has to wear a dog harness.”

Customer: “Are you a foreigner or something? Real Americans like dogs!”

Me: “I am American and I like dogs, but I like cats, too.”

Customer: “Un-American!” *storms off*