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Maybe He Is Under The Weather

| USA | Right | November 6, 2013

(I am volunteering at the info booth for a festival. A festival attendee approaches the table.)

Me: “Hi! Can I help you?”

Attendee: “Do you see those vapor trails?”

(The attendee points to the sky, where a few contrails are visible.)

Me: “Yeah?”

Attendee: “That’s how the government controls the weather.”

(The attendee walks away like nothing happened.)

Me: “…oooookay then.”

Hopefully It’s Smooth Sailing From Here On

| Wales, UK | Right | November 6, 2013

(I work at a canoe centre. We occasionally get people complaining about things they don’t like; we have a feedback form for this. A couple walks in, looking angry.)

Me: “Hi! Did you enjoy your day?”

Customer #1: “No, it was horrible!”

Me: “Oh, okay, well if you want to fill in the feedback form about why, that’d be helpful. Can I ask why?”

Customer #2: “Well, we got wet of course!”

Me: “But you went canoeing on a river?”

Customer #1: “Yes, but you should have told us we could get wet!”

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Death Goes Shopping

| Sydney, NSW, Australia | Right | November 6, 2013

(I am working behind the register on my first ever day of employment. It is also a particularly busy day. I am finalizing the purchase and handing the customer her bag…)

Me: “Thank you for shopping at [Store]; have a nice day!”

(The customer snaps her head up, gasping, while simultaneously dropping her bag of goods to the floor.)

Customer:What did you say?”

Me: “I thanked you for shopping here, and told you to have a good d—”

Customer: “I know what you said! You told me to have a good DEATH!”

Me: “Ma’am, I can assure you that I did not say anything of the kind.”

Customer: “You DID! You DID and it’s YOU that should be dying, YOU B****! I can assure you that I’ll be taking this further!”

(There is an unimpressed looking customer next in line.)

Next Customer: “Lady, pick up your s*** and get out of here, or I’ll kill you myself.”

See this story as a comic!

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A Bitter Drink With A Sweet After Taste

| Right | November 6, 2013

Buzz And Raise

| Right | November 6, 2013

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