Dating A Different Class
Date: “Were you Blur or Oasis?”
Me: “Pulp!”
Date: “Yup, you’ll do!”
Date: “Were you Blur or Oasis?”
Me: “Pulp!”
Date: “Yup, you’ll do!”
(I’m working at the grocery counter, and we are absolutely slammed and very short-staffed. I am on an eight-hour shift, and our payroll department automatically takes out 30 minutes of pay for lunch when we work past six.)
Me: “Hey, do you know if I’m going to be able to go to lunch soon? I’m already past the four-hour mark.”
Supervisor: “It might be late, but you’ll get it.”
Me: “You sure? We’re really busy, so I was worried.”
Supervisor: “Don’t worry; I’ll talk to the manager. It won’t be a problem.”
(My supervisor leaves to go speak with the manager.)
Supervisor: *to the manager* “Hey, can [My Name] get her lunch break? She’s already been here over four hours.”
Manager: “Well, if we have time.”
Supervisor: “If we have time?”
Manager: “We’re really busy. She might have to go without.”
Supervisor: “You know that that’s incredibly illegal, right? A violation of labor laws?”
Manager: “…”
Supervisor: “…”
Manager: *to me, grumpily* “Go on break.”
This story is included in our Lunch Break story roundup!
(I have left very little toilet paper on the roll, and my fiancée is in the bathroom.)
Fiancée: “Honey, there’s no toilet paper!”
(I get her another roll, as it’s in the hall closet.)
Me: “Sorry for leaving you high and dry like that!”
Fiancée: “No, you DIDN’T leave me dry! That’s the problem here!”
(I’ve just finished telling my mom about a boy at school that I have a crush on, who has asked me to hang out one day after school. I’m 14, and my little sister, who has been listening the entire time, is 7.)
Mom: “I think it’s great that you might have a boyfriend, honey.”
Sister: “Yeah, well, I have a boyfriend too, mama.”
Me: *snorts* “Yeah, right.”
Sister: “I DO! I have a boyfriend! He’s from China.”
Me: “Yeah? Well, what’s his name?”
(My little sister thinks for a second, then sports a giant grin.)
Sister: “Tokyo!”
(Our restaurant is along a fairly popular tourist route. It’s not uncommon to get customers from out of the country during the summer and fall seasons. I hear my coworker having an argument with a customer.)
Coworker: “I already told you we don’t serve that here!”
Customer: “Of course you do; I can see them from here.”
Coworker: “I don’t know what you’re looking at but we don’t sell chips. If you want some that badly you can go to the gas station across the street.”
Me: “Is everything okay?”
Coworker: “This guy wants chips but we don’t sell chips! He won’t listen to me.”
Me: “Sir, you would like to order some chips today?”
Customer: “Yes please.”
(I ring the order in myself and bring the customer his ‘chips.’ He leaves happily.)
Coworker: “What the… you just gave him fries!? How—”
Me: “He’s from England; they call fries ‘chips.’ Didn’t you notice his accent?”
Coworker: “Oh… I guess he did talk kind of funny…”