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Talking At Cross-Dress Purposes

| London, England, UK | Related | November 11, 2013

Sister: “Ugh, walking in high heels is really hard!”

Dad: “I wouldn’t know.”

Me: “You’re saying you haven’t worn high heels?”

Dad: “Not that I can remember, no.”

Me: “Because I recall you saying something about wearing fishnet tights for a fancy dress party, and if you weren’t wearing high heels as well you were doing it wrong!”

No Vocation For Location, Part 9

| NJ, USA | Related | November 11, 2013

(I am in the car with my little sister and my father. We see a Quebec license plate.)

Little Sister: “Isn’t Quebec in Georgia?”

Me: “No, Quebec is a province in Canada.”

Little Sister: “Oh.”

(A few months later, we are watching something about the Civil War. They mention Atlanta.)

Little Sister: “Isn’t Atlanta in Quebec?”

Me: “What are they teaching you at school?”

 

Playing In The Big Garden (State) In The Sky

| VA, USA | Related | November 11, 2013

(My three-year-old daughter’s hamster has died, so we have to tell her. About a month before, my grandmother had passed away.)

Me: “Your hamster isn’t in her cage because she died.”

Daughter: “Where did she go?”

Me: “Remember Great-Grandma, and how we talked about what happened to her?”

Daughter: “My hamster went to New Jersey?!”

She’s Hideous

| Related | November 11, 2013

frabz-what-do-you-mean-i-look-like-my-sister-shes-hideous-e66f6c

Loves You From The Bottom Of His Stomach

| Ogden, UT, USA | Romantic | November 11, 2013

(My fiancé and I have gone for a late night coffee run. We’re walking back to the car.)

Me: “Thanks for coffee, love! That was fun.”

Fiancé: “You’re welco—”

(I let out a long and loud burp.)

Fiancé: “Wow, babe…”

Me: “Let me sing you the song of my people?”

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