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I’m Sorry?

Extras

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Shouldn’t Sweater Over It

| Newcastle, England, UK | Holidays, Liars & Scammers, Theme Of The Month, Wild & Unruly

(I’m looking for a popular Christmas jumper (sweater) and have finally found one in my size. It is the last one in the store and I have put it in my trolley. I’m just browsing around the other clothes when a customer looks into my trolley and takes the jumper.)

Me: “Excuse me, but what are you doing?”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Me: “That jumper was in my trolley. I’m buying it.”

Customer: “No. It wasn’t. I’ve just got this off the rail! Stop hassling me!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I just WATCHED YOU take it out of my trolley and put it into your basket. Can you please give it back so I can go and buy it?”

Customer: “No. It’s not your colour. Anyway, I didn’t take it out of your trolley.”

Me: “Okay. There is an easy way of solving this. Why don’t we go and visit security and get them to look at the camera? If you took it out of my trolley then you give it back. If you didn’t and I was mistaken I will pay for the jumper for you as an apology. How does that sound?”

Customer: “HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF BEING A THIEF YOU F*****G SKANK!”

Me: “Right. I’ve had enough of this now. I came here just for that jumper.”

(I grab it out of the basket. The customer walks away, muttering loudly.)

Customer: “Such a b****. Ruining Christmas for me!”

Outdated And Outsmarted

| Kent, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(I’m doing a bit of Christmas shopping. I stop at a calendar stand in the middle of the shopping center, and start looking through the stock. I think nothing of two customers appearing next to me until they start talking.)

Customer #1: “Are these calendars for next year?”

Customer #2: “I don’t know. Check the date.”

Customer #1: “I can’t see it.”

Me: “Are you serious?”

Customer #1: “Excuse me?”

Me: “It’s the middle of December. The last month of the year. Why would anybody need to buy a calendar for this year?”

Customer #2: “You can’t talk to my daughter like that! She’s not stupid!”

Me: “With all due respect, I’m not the one questioning if calendars being sold in December are for next year.”