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Doesn’t Understand The ‘Custom’ Part Of Customer

| MO, USA | Books & Reading, Crazy Requests, Home Improvement

(A popular bookstore chain is going out of business, and all of their stores are having ‘going-out-of-business’ sales. One such store is located in the same plaza as the home improvement store where I work.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Home Improvement Store]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, you guys are located in the same plaza as [Bookstore] right?”

Me: Yes, ma’am, we are located a few stores down from [Bookstore]. How can I assist you today?”

Customer: “Are they open?”

Me: “That particular branch of [Bookstore] hasn’t closed their doors yet, but given the fact that they’re going out of business, I’m not sure how much longer they’ll stay open.”

Customer: “Well, I just tried calling them and no one is answering the phone.”

Me: “I do know that they are still open. However it’s possible that whatever few employees are actually still working there are currently assisting other customers at the moment, so I would try giving them a call again a little bit later. In the meantime, is there anything we here at [Home Improvement Store] can help you with today?”

Customer: “Yeah, could you go down to [Bookstore] and see if they have any copies of [various book titles] left?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but no one here is going to be able to leave the store in order to check that for you.”

Customer: “Well, why the h*** not?”

Me: “Because we’re all employees of [Home Improvement Store], not [Bookstore]. We’re all needed here.”

Customer: “You retail people are supposed to go above and beyond for your customers!”

Me: “We do a lot for our customers, ma’am. You, however, have expressed no interest in being our customer, but rather that of [Bookstore].”

Customer: “Well, you’re no f****** help!”

(I ended up transferring her call to my manager, who laughed at her request to send one of his employees to check the inventory of a different store.)

The Bill Of Wrongs

| VA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Hotels & Lodging, Theme Of The Month

Me: “Hello, may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, this receipt.”

Me: “Was there something wrong with the charges?”

Customer: “No, they’re fine, I just don’t… like it.”

Me: “What don’t you like about it?”

Customer: “Well, for instance, the total should be on the top, not the bottom. And my name should be on the bottom, not the top. See? And the font should be prettier.”

Me: “So what you’re saying is you don’t like the format of our receipt?”

Customer: “Exactly!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but to change the format of our receipt would mean that we have change our computer’s automatic program.”

Customer: “Well DO it then!”

Me: “That would take hours.”

Customer: “Well I don’t HAVE hours! I have a plane to catch!”

Me: “I’ll get the manager.”

(I get the manager and he explains exactly what I said to the woman, who gets more and more irritated by the second.)

Customer: “Fine! I thought you gave good service here; I guess I was wrong! Hmph!”

(The customer takes her bill and storms off in a huff. Later, we get a survey back taken from her, giving us poor reviews on our service. I have gotten a lot of crazy requests before, but never that!)

Why The F***?

Extras

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