Customer: “Excuse me, miss, but can I ask you something?”
Coworker: “Sure thing, sir.”
Customer: “You’re Asian, yes?”
Coworker: “Yes, sir.”
Customer: “Which part of Asia are you from?”
Coworker: “Oh, I’m from Thailand.”
Customer: “What? You just told me you were Asian!”
Coworker: “Yes, I am, sir. Thailand is part of Asia.”
Customer: “No, it’s not!”
Coworker: *stays silent*
Customer: “Oh yeah, I remember now. Vietnam is that little island next to Korea!”
(I’m a volunteer at an animal shelter. People can pay a small donation to come and see our animals. One day I’m returning a dog to its kennel when a customer approaches me.)
Customer: “This is ridiculous! I want to see your manager!”
Me: “Um, I’m just a volunteer here, sir. If you speak to somebody in reception—”
Customer: “Rubbish! You’re just making excuses! I paid my donation to see your dogs and I can only get into one block. The other three are closed! I know you have more dogs!”
Me: “We close three blocks for the dogs’ welfare, sir. If you’re interested in—”
Customer: “I don’t give a f*** about the dogs’ welfare! I want to see more dogs! You have no customer service at all, do you?!”
(On hearing this, another customer approaches and gives the very rude customer a £5 note.)
Another Customer: “Here’s £5; consider it a refund. Because I can tell you, sir, they would absolutely NOT allow you anywhere near their animals with that attitude!”
(It’s nearing the end of summer and my coworker and I are clearing away the summer theming in our shop window to make a place for something else. This happens as I’m about to cut up an inflatable Orca.)
Child: “No, don’t kill it! Can I please have it?”
Coworker #1: “Yeah, sure.”
Child: “Yes! I can take it home and care for it in our pool. It needs water to live in!”
Coworker #1: *hands the child the toy* “Now, be very careful with it because it’s very fragile—”
Child: *runs out of the store to his mother before my coworker can finish*
Me: “How cute, I bet he’ll take good care—”
Mother: *smacks the inflatable against a few objects and stamps on it with her high heels*
Me: “Never mind…”
(About an hour passes as I overhear a conversation going on at the till. I notice the child with his mother and the popped toy.)
Mother: “Well, clearly it’s faulty. Look at it! It’s full of holes, and that was out of the packaging!”
Coworker #2: “I’m really sorry, but without a receipt, I cannot provide you with a new one.”
Mother: *to her child* “Do you hear that? They sell me a broken toy and refuse to replace it. I want to speak to the manager!”
Me: “Excuse me, miss, but I believe a colleague of mine gave your child that toy and you destroyed it just outside the shop.”
Mother: “How dare you make such an accusation?! Who do you think you are?”
Me: “I’m the person who set up the display with that same toy several months before. I marked it with a black pen around the valve noting that it would be destroyed at the end of the display time. I’m also the person who was there watching you destroy the toy outside.”
Mother: “That is a lie and I want a new toy!”
Coworker #2: “I cannot give you a new one without your receipt.”
Child: “Mommy, you said that if you made it leaky, you could get me a brand new one for free!”
Mother: “Well, you will because I know I’m right and they are wrong. I’ll just buy you a new one and send in a complaint on their website!”
(The mother proceeds to buy a new inflatable orca. It’s a size smaller and a different color than the one from the display since we didn’t have any more large ones.)
Mother: *to her child* “See, if you are smart and cunning, you get what you want whenever you want!”
(My fiancé and I are at the beach, and the sun is starting to set.)
Me: “Look! It’s so beautiful. Be romantic with me!”
(I snuggle in his arms.)
Him: “Okay, I’m being romantic. Are we looking at the sunset or the fat guy?”
(My girlfriend’s neighbor gets some fireworks for the 4th of July. I go over to enjoy them. Note that I’m about three inches shorter than my girlfriend.)
Me: “I’m so excited. I’ve never actually set off fireworks before.”
Girlfriend: “It’s pretty cool if you got the right ones.”
(As she says that, her neighbor sets one off that screams.)
Me: “Oh, God!” *I hide behind her*
Girlfriend: *dies laughing*
This story is part of the American Independence Day 2021 roundup!
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