Archive for 2012

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Now That Is What I Call Up-Selling

| AZ, USA | Extra Stupid, Money

(Our store matches print ads for other stores in the area.)

Customer: “These are on sale for $4.50 at [other store].”

Me: “Ours are $3.89 for that.”

Customer: “I insist that you ad match this for me.”

Me: “Okay…”

Try To Keep A Poke Face

| WI, USA | Rude & Risque

(An old man comes up to purchase a pair of shoes. I am nearby while my manager rings it up.)

Manager: “Now, hold onto your receipt, because you can use it anytime to get another pair half price!”

Customer: “Oh, I doubt I’ll get to use it. I’ll probably be dead before I need new shoes again.”

Manager: “Oh, don’t say that! You’ve got to stay positive!”

Customer: “Ah, when you get to be my age, all the ‘positive’ gets used up. First you can’t poke it no more, and then it just goes downhill from there!” *leaves*

Crying Over Spoiled Milk

| Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Spouses & Partners, Top

(I’m working in a restaurant at the bar where we also make coffees. I’m standing at the espresso machine when a male customer approaches to order.)

Customer: “I’d like a cappuccino with no milk, please.”

(This confuses me, as milk is a necessary component for cappuccinos.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Do you mean a black coffee? A long black, perhaps? That’s espresso topped up with hot water?”

Customer: “No, I want a normal cappuccino; just don’t put any milk in it.”

Me: “Well, that would just be a short black or espresso shot. Is that what you’re after?”

Customer: “No! Look, it’s not that complicated. Just make me a cappuccino, but leave out the milk.”

(Still confused, I make up a shot of espresso in a cappuccino cup and show the customer.)

Me: “Is this what you want?”

Customer: “No! Ugh! You kids these days don’t know anything about making decent coffees!”

(I actually have over six years experience making coffees.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I just don’t understand what you want me to make.”

(The customer storms off back to his table in the bistro. Not long after, a woman comes up to the bar.)

Woman: “I’d just like to apologise for my idiot of a husband and order a cappuccino with skinny milk. Honestly, how did he expect you to make a cappuccino with no milk at all?”

(The male customer avoided me for the rest of the evening out of embarrassment, but the woman gave me a nice tip!)