Archive for 2012

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I Bought This A Year Ago

Extras

Just Tell Him The Title, Pure And Simplex

| WA, USA | Rude & Risque, Top

(A customer approaches the counter with his girlfriend/partner. He wants to make sure that he has returned all of his items. The only book left on his account is one on a sensitive topic.)

Me: “Well, it looks like there is just one… uh… health book on here.”

Customer: “What? What ‘health book?’ I don’t have no ‘health’ books out.”

Me: “Uh… it is a book about a… specific illness. If you like, I can show you how to look up your account information in private at our website.”

Customer: “No, no, no! I don’t have time for all that. Just tell me what the dang book is!”

Me: “It’s called Managing Herpes.”

(The girlfriend’s eyes go wide and she turns to the customer.)

Customer’s Girlfriend: “You… what… but you said… WHAT?!”

(Both of them left quickly after that!)

Please Pound Into Her Head We Don’t Use Dollars

| UK | Money, Top, Tourists/Travel

(A tourist in front of me just ordered a coffee.)

Cashier: “That will be £6.10, please.”

Tourist: *hands him two USD $5 bills*

Cashier: “We only accept English sterling.”

Tourist: “So, you don’t take dollar bills?”

Cashier: “No, only English sterling.”

Tourist: *to her husband* “I can’t believe it! They only accept English sterling!”

Another Customer: “Well, it’s ENGLAND!”