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Extras Roundup: Comics By Amanda Baker

| Not Always Right | Right | October 20, 2012

What do you do when customers give you lemons? Make lemonade of course! Amanda Baker turns daily customer annoyances into laughs with her great comics. Check out some we’ve gathered from our Extras section that we hope you enjoy as much as we do. Don’t forget to Like us on Facebook and follow our new Not Always Right: Unfiltered Tumblr!

Hipster Snow White
(13 thumbs up)
Fat Liver
(40 thumbs up)
(47 thumbs up)
Different Faces of Customers
(65 thumbs up)

Do you have a funny comic to share or did you create one of your own? Share it with us! We’d love to hear from you.

Small Minds Can Lose Out On Big Sales

| London, UK | Working | October 20, 2012

(I am on a school trip from Germany to London when this happened in a Gothic fashion store. My English is pretty good, but I am shy and thus didn’t speak much and stumbled over words. I am also overweight and very insecure about it. I have found a corset which is obviously two sizes to small, so I go to ask if they have any more sizes.)

Me: “Excuse me—”

Employee: “THAT is definitely not your size.”

Me: “Uhm, yes. Do you have it in… uhm… a bigger… I mean… larger size?”

Employee: “I don’t think so.” *talking to herself, but clearly loud enough for me to hear* “Oh god, stupid tourists. Of course li’l fatty is gonna squeeze into that corset no matter what!”

Me: “I just wanted a larger size. If you don’t have any, I’ll look around for other clothes.”

Employee: “Yeah, I doubt anything we have fits you.”

(My english teacher has been listening on the side and speaks up.)

My English Teacher: “I doubt anything you have in here ‘fits’ any of my students. We’ll take our business elsewhere.”

(With that, my teacher made the entire class of 25 people leave, leaving the store completely empty. She’s been my favourite teacher ever since!)

1 Thumbs

In Other News, Seals View Plays

| Connecticut, USA | Working | October 20, 2012

Me: “Hi, I need some help finding a book. It’s called Sacre Bleu by Christopher Moore. It’s a French word.”

Librarian: “Okay, let me see…”

(We spend a good half hour looking by title and then author. She can’t find it.)

Librarian: “Well, you can look in our sports section if you want a book about soccer.”

Me: “Eh? Why would I want a sports book?”

Librarian: “Didn’t you want a book called Soccer Blue?”

Me: *speechless*

Why Emo’s Really Bug You

| Sweden | Related | October 20, 2012

(I am going through a gothic/punk phase as a young teenager, and I am very interested in horror movies. We are having a normal family dinner conversation.)

Mom: “Do you remember those cockroaches in your and grandma’s hotel room last year?”

Me: “Mm?”

Mom: “I read today you shouldn’t kill them.”

Me: “Really?”

Mom: “Yeah. Apparently they are drawn to the smell of death. Just like you.”

Does Not Need A Gundam Wing(man)

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Romantic | October 20, 2012

(An acquaintance and I are getting materials for a costume we’re both working on, a Gundam (essentially, a giant robot). He’s the one that will be wearing the finished costume, while my costume is the technician from the same anime series; her outfit consists of a fitted and fairly short dress and jacket.)

Him: “Man, you gotta be careful at the convention!”

Me: “What?”

Him: “All those pervs and fanboys! Dat a** is gonna attract them like crazy.”

Me: “Eh, I can handle the creepers at the convention.”

Him: “Naw, it’ll be up to me to protect you from the creepy fanboys. I’m all up in that chivalrous honor thing.”

(I’ve known for awhile that he has a huge crush on me. I also know that he’s a horny pervert; he fronts it with this sort of faux-chivalry thing to try and get into a woman’s pants.)

Me: *starting to get annoyed* “I’m perfectly capable of telling a pervert off, y’know.”

Him: “Yeah, but these guys, they don’t take ‘no’ from a woman. They’ll listen to a guy telling them off! But don’t worry, I’ll protect you from the bad guys!”

Me: *visibly annoyed* “I don’t need a ‘protector’ at the convention. There will be security all over the place, and I am perfectly capable of inflicting grievous bodily harm in self-defense. Plus I’ve got pepper spray in my purse.”

Him: *oblivious* “Yeah, any guys try and get close to you, they’ll have to deal with me first, and I won’t take any of their s***!”

Me: *finally had it*You won’t be dealing with anyone. You will be wearing a costume over seven feet tall. You’ll be on seven inch tall giant platform shoes. You are barely going to be able to walk, never mind ‘rescuing’ maidens from the scaaaary creepers at the convention.”

Him: “But you’ll be in that short dress!”

Me: “And you have no business dictating who is allowed to speak with me at the convention! You are not my boyfriend, you will never be my boyfriend, and if you were my boyfriend, that sort of attitude would bring that relationship to a screeching and immediate halt! Are we clear?”

Him: *shrinking back* “Okay, okay! You know I’m just looking out for you, babe.”

(He ended up getting the ‘just friends/no I will not sleep with you’ talk. Not too long after the convention, we had a rather major falling out and haven’t spoken since.)

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