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Think Before You Ask

Extras

Not-So-Smart Phone, Part 4

| Cedar Rapids, IA, USA | Bad Behavior

(I am sweeping, cleaning off all the phones and in the process of shutting the lights off. Two minutes before we close, someone decides to walk in. They want to do an upgrade and sign a new 2 year contract; this is a process that takes up to 30 minutes.)

Customer: “…I’m also looking to get a new phone on my plan.”

Me: “Great! Looking to do an upgrade on a current line or adding a new one?”

Customer: “Update or whatever you call it.”

Me: “Sounds good. Are you eligible?”

(I should have checked, but it’s late and I take his word for it.)

Customer: “Yep, I know which one I want. This one!” *points to a brand new smartphone*

Me: “Okay, let me get that phone from the back and I’ll ring you up right here.”

(After getting the phone, getting it set up and ringing it up, it shows the phone is full retail price because he is currently still in contract.)

Me: “Sir, it looks like you are not eligible. In fact, you’ve only had that phone for 3 months. If you’d like to purchase this new phone today, it will be $560.00 full retail.”

Customer: “What!? I don’t have that kind of money. It says right on the sign that it’s only $50! I only want to pay that.”

Me: “The $50 price is for customers who are eligible to upgrade their phones. They get a discounted price for signing a two year contract, like you did three months ago.”

Customer: “I never signed no f***ing contract! Now, give me the new phone at that price. That’s false advertising.”

Me: “Sir, my system won’t let me. You are not eligible.”

Customer: “You are just as greedy at Satan himself. Liars! I am calling the [cellphone company] president tomorrow and getting you fired and your f***ing store shut down!” *storms out*

Coworker: “Drinks on me tonight?”

Me: “Thought you’d never ask.”

Related:
Not-So-Smart Phone, Part 3

Fuming Over Perfuming

Robeline, LA, USA | Awesome Customers

(A customer enters and I walk around to greet him.)

Me: *wiping my eyes* “Good evening!” *sniffles* “How are you?”

Customer: “Hey don’t cry! Who did it?! Who made you cry?” *he looks around for other customers*

Me: *smiling* “Thanks for your concern, but it’s just my allergies. I’ve had several customers who had on too much cologne or perfume.”

Customer: “Oh, I was worried there for a minute. I thought I was going to have to kick someone’s a** for you!”