Archive for 2010

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Life Mangoes On

, | | Right | January 5, 2010

Customer: “I want a shake.”

Me: “What kind would you like?”

Customer: “A milkshake.”

Me: “Okay, sir. What flavor would you like?”

Customer: “Whatever kind you have.”

Me: “We have, vanilla, chocolate, banana, strawberry, peach and fudge. Which one would you like?”

Customer: “Mango.”

Me: “We don’t have mango sir, would you like the peach?”

Customer: “No! I want a mango milkshake. Why does nobody ever understand?” *walks away*

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No Flirting A-Loud

| | Right | January 4, 2010

(I’m scanning out an elderly couple. The man is obviously hard of hearing.)

Me: “Hello, and how are you folks today?”

Customer: “You look so young. Why is that?”

Me: “I’m only 19.”

Customer: “What?”

Customer’s wife: “SHE SAYS SHE’S NINETEEN!”

Customer: “Oh…do you have a boyfriend?”

Me: “I’m engaged, actually.”

Customer: “What?”

Customer’s wife: “SHE SAYS SHE’S ENGAGED!”

Customer: “Oh…do you want to go out with me sometime?”

Me: “Uh…here, I’ll just finish scanning your items for you.”

Customer: “What?”

Customer’s Wife: “SHE TURNED YOU DOWN!”

Also seen on: Not Always Romantic

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In Spock We Trust

| | Right | January 4, 2010

Customer: “Why is Star Trek on the wall?”

Me: “It’s a new release sir, interested in renting it?”

Customer: “Son, Star Trek is a tool of the Devil. I demand that you remove it from your shelves!”

Me: “I can’t do that.”

Customer: “God forgive you for corrupting the youth of America!”

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Many Problems To Address

| | Right | January 4, 2010

Customer: “Excuse me, I sent a letter last week but it came back. Can you tell me why?”

Me: “Sure, do you have it with you?”

(The customer hands it over. It doesn’t take long to figure out the problem.)

Me: “Oh, okay. You’re going to need a valid house address to have it sent.”

Customer: “I did put the address!”

Me: “That’s an email address, ma’am.”

Customer: “Yes, and it’s valid. I checked!”

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Refreshingly Stupid

| | Right | January 4, 2010

Caller: “So, my item has been stuck in the shopping cart with the little thingy spinning for the last 20 minutes.”

Me: “By any chance have you tried refreshing your screen?”

Caller: “Of course. I’ve tried that three times now.”

Me: “And what happened when you refreshed sir?”

Caller: “The screen went black then came back on the screen with the spinny-thingy.”

Me: “Sir, it sounds like your turning your monitor on and off, not refreshing the screen.”

Caller: “Well, it looks refreshed to me!”

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