An Un-Usual Request

Fast Food, Impossible Demands, Main Character Energy, USA | Right | December 14, 2009

Me: “What can I get for you today?”

Customer: “I’ll just have my usual.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, we don’t know your usual.”

Customer: “They know it on [Other Location].”

Me: “We’re not that location, sir. What would you like?”

Customer: “Just call ’em up and ask. I’ll wait!”

This story is part of the Customers Expecting Mind-Readers roundup! This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!

15 Hilarious Stories About Customers Demanding The Impossible

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Read the Customers Expecting Mind-Readers roundup!

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There Can Be Only One

Impossible Demands, Main Character Energy, Retail, USA | Right | December 14, 2009

(I am a manager in a department store. I’m returning a call to a customer who has a complaint.)

Me: “Hi, this is [My Name] calling from [Department Store] to follow up with your concern.”

Customer: “Yes, I was in your store yesterday and I had to wait in line forever. I had a coupon that expired at one pm. I got tired of waiting, so I just left.”

Me: “I’m sorry about that. Would you mind telling me in which area you were trying to pay?”

Customer: “All over. The lines were long everywhere. I’m thinking about cutting up the credit card I have with you all!”

Me: “Well, I do want to thank you for letting me know. We had tried to make sure that someone was scheduled to ring at every register, and it looks like we have some opportunity to improve that.”

Customer: “Oh, every register had someone ringing at it. There were plenty of salespeople.”

Me: “Well… uh… how can I help you then?”

Customer: “There were just too many customers in your store!”

This story is part of the complaining customer roundup! This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!

23 Times Theme Park Customers Gave Employees Emotional Roller-Coasters!

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Domestically Dimwitted

Coworkers, Editors' Choice, Holidays, LGBTQ, Retail, USA | Right | December 14, 2009

(Our store is famous for our women’s scents. I see a male customer looking uncomfortable.)

Customer: “Uh, miss? Can you help me?”

Me: “Of course. Who is it that you are shopping for today?”

Customer: “Well, we had a Secret Santa thing at the office, and I got this guy… um… he’s the kind of person with a domestic partner.”

Me: “Oh! I gotcha! We’ve got some great pre-made gift sets in the men’s department. There’s a wonderful shaving set and body washes, too.”

(I lead him to the men’s section. On the way, the customer sees a flowery red and pink gift box with one of our most popular woman’s fragrances inside.)

Customer: “What about this one? These are on sale, right?”

Me: “Well, yes, but that’s really a more feminine fragrance, a strong floral. Let me show you–”

Customer: “No, no, no. DO-MES-TIC PART-NER. I really think he’ll like this one better. You know, cause he’s… well, you know…”

Me: “Sir, we could set up a gift card for you. That way, he can pick out his own body care since you are unsure.”

Customer: “I don’t think you understand me. He’s… the guy is gay. I’ll take this one.”

(To the unfortunate gift recipient: I am so terribly sorry! I’ll be thinking of you this Christmas!)

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