Archive for 2008

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You’re Just Compounding The Issue

, | | Right | December 12, 2008

(A customer had purchased a few items and was double-checking her receipt after the transaction went through. She had a membership card at the store, so she got a 10% discount.)

Customer: “So I got my discount on this?”

Me: “Yep, see there on each item it says ‘Member 10%’, and it shows what you saved.”

Customer: “Wait…is it 10% off each item, or 10% off the total?”

Me: “10% off the total. Well, it works out the same either way.”

Customer: “I thought it was supposed to be 10% off each item. I should be getting a bigger discount on the total.”

Me: “No, you got your discount! 10% off each item adds up to the same amount as 10% off the total.”

Customer: “No, I got 10% off the first item. Then 10% off the second item, so that’s 20%. And 10% off the third item; that’s 30%!”

Me: *pause* “No, that’s…that’s not how percentages work… I can show you on a calculator; it works out the same. You are getting the right discount.”

Customer: “No, it’s all right. But I know I won’t be getting this card again. I was told I was going to be getting a 10% discount on each item, and this really isn’t fair.”

(Maybe I should have mentioned to her that I’m a math major…)

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That’s A Talented Cow

, | | Right | December 12, 2008

Me: “What can I get for you?”

Customer: “I’ll have a turkey sub. No. Ham. I’ll have a ham and cheese sub.”

Me: “What kind of cheese would you like?”

Customer: “Bologna.”

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The Employee Is Always Wrong

| | Right | December 11, 2008

Customer Of The Week: The Employee Is Always Wrong
Created by our friends at Quitting Time

Original Story

Diagnostics Through Osmosis

| | Right | December 11, 2008

(I was working part-time in my dad’s shop when a customer came in with a blue Kia Pride.)

Me: “Good afternoon, ma’am. How can I help you?”

Customer: “My car don’t work.”

Me: “OK, ma’am. What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “It don’t work.”

Me: “Um, could you specify, ma’am?”

Customer: “I just told you, it don’t work.”

Me: “Uh, OK…let me just take a look to see what the problem is.”

Customer: “No!!”

Me: “Huh? Why?!”

Customer: “Nobody goes into my property, and my car is my property!!”

Me: “But I have to see your car to know what the problem is, ma’am.”

Customer: “I just told you! It don’t work!”

Me: “…”

(Turns out, she just ran out of gas.)

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Who You Gonna Call?

| | Right | December 11, 2008

Me: “Hi, can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, do you sell ghost vacuums?”

Me: “Umm… no?”

Customer: “Ok, well… thanks anyway.”

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