Archive for 2007

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The Return Of Captain Obvious

, | Florida, USA | Top

Customer in an ice cream shop: “What’s in the Chocolate Caramel Cashew?”

Me: “There’s really no way for me to answer that without sounding like a smarta**.”

Customer: “Why? What’s in it?”

Me: “It’s chocolate ice cream … with caramel … and cashews.”

Related:
Captain Obvious To The Rescue
Belaboring The Obvious

Time To Call The Plumber

| Tel Aviv, Israel | Technology, Top

Me: “Internet helpdesk, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I can’t connect to the internet.”

Me: “How long has it been since you last connected?”

Customer: “I was connected until a few minutes ago.”

Me: “Have you changed anything in your network?”

Customer: “Well, I was downloading some movies over the net, but the download got too slow. I called a friend of mine and he told me that some movies could’ve gotten stuck in the cable. So I cut the cable to see if I could yank it out of there. I didn’t find anything, so I taped the cable back together. Now, can you get it back to work?”

Me: *grimace*

Shhhh, They’re Listening Right Now!

| Canada | Uncategorized

Me: “**** University, how my I help you?”

Phone client: “What is this about you recording my call? Are you guys working for CSIS (Canadian Security Intelligence Service)?”

Me: “No sir, we record some calls in order to ensure the quality of our service. What can I do for you today?”

Phone client: “Are you recording my call right now?”

Me: “I don’t know sir. Management records call randomly.”

*Hangs up*