When Generations Collide
Old man in a Japanese Gift Shop: “Do you carry thongs here?”
Me: “Uh… WHAT?”
Old man: “You know… flippity flops… sandals!”
Archive for 2007
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Better Idea: Make Your Boys Wear Dresses
Lady customer: “Where’s your boy stuff?”
Me: “We don’t really have any. This store is mainly targeted for girls.”
Lady customer: “WELL YOU SHOULD!”
The State Eats Cuddly Puppies & Kittens, Too
Me: “Good Afternoon, [Mississippi Government Department]. How may I help you?”
Caller: “Yes, I would like y’all to get me some food stamps. My kids are hungry and I got fired last week.”
Me: “Ma’am, we don’t issue food stamps. You need to contact the Department of Human Services.”
Caller: “What?! My cousin told me to call y’all and y’all would get us fed. I know the State has lots of monies, can’t you just send us some?”
Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, you need to call DHS and they will be able to assist you.”
Caller: “F*** You! The God-D***ed State never does a d*** thing for us poor folks! I hope you feel the fires of Hell for starving children!” *click*
Me: *stunned silence*
I Think She Wants A Discount
Trainee: “Hey, this woman would like to buy an iPod Touch. But she’s asking for a discount.”
Me: *to the lady customer* “Hi, so you’re interested in an iPod Touch?”
Customer: “Discount?”
Me: “Sorry, I can’t offer anything below our tagged price. It already has a guaranteed low price.”
Customer: “Discount?”
Me: “If you’re worried about money, you can choose to apply for a store credit card. With it you can buy this iPod Touch and have three months to pay interest-free.”
Customer: “Okay, so I get a card and get a discount?”
Me: “No, but you have three months to pay.”
Customer: “What’s the price in three months?”
Me: “It’s the same price as now.”
Customer: “Okay. What’s the price after the three months?”
Me: “It is the exact same price as you see here now. But with the card you get three months to pay for it.”
Customer: “Discount?”
Me: “Okay, let’s ring this up for you.”
This story is part of our Demands For Discounts roundup!
Read the next Demands For Discounts roundup story!
Read the Demands For Discounts roundup!
I’m Sure We Have A Book On That Topic
Customer: “Excuse me, how do I get up the stairs?”
Me: “If you don’t already know, I’m afraid I can’t help you.”