Archive for 2007

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If A Is Equal To B …

| Colorado, USA | Uncategorized

(Mexican restaurant; the pico de gallo salsa is the same as mild)

Lady: “I’ll have the pico de gallo and the mild.”

Me: “Oh, well, they’re the same thing.”

Lady: “…But I want both.”

Me: “O…K…” *scoops pico de gallo* “…there’s the pico, and…” *adds another scoop* “…there’s the mild.”

On The Futility Of Signs

| Flagstaff, AZ, USA | Top

(One customer complains about a game that is not giving tickets. Upon looking at the game, I discover that a fuse is blown. I place several “Out of Order” stickers over the coin slot and refund the customer. Two minutes later another customer approaches.)

Customer: “I just put a coin in this game and won tickets but none came out.”

Me: “I placed an ‘Out of Order’ sticker on the coin slot. Is it not on there anymore?”

Customer: “You mean these? They were in the way so I removed them. Can I get a refund?”

You Go On Wit Yo Bad DIY Self!

| Australia | Uncategorized

Caller: “Hello, I’d like some help!”

Me: “Sure sir, how can I help you?”

Caller: “Well, actually I don’t have an account yet. I was wondering if I could talk or send messages to my daughter. She’s in Australia and she has an internet account.”

Me: “Yes sir, that’s possible!”

Caller: “What do I need to do that?”

Me: “You just need a computer and a modem.”

Caller: “Hey, but just have a FAX machine and a TV! Isn’t that enough?”

Me: *controlling the urge to burst in laughter* “I’m afraid not, sir. You’ll need a computer for sure.”

Caller: “YOU KNOW WHAT? You guys don’t wanna help me! I know your types! You just want the fat, rich customers that will buy anything you demand! You know what? You’re not the only ISP in town! Goodbye!” *click*

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