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Dad Jokes Are Supposed To Be Unfunny, Not Unfriendly

, , , , , | Right | September 24, 2021

I work at a museum that has a suggested donation in lieu of a set ticket price. Part of my job is greeting visitors as they walk in and explaining about the donation, etc. A man with his wife and young son comes in one day and ends up providing me with one of the most uncomfortable and absurd exchanges I’ve had while working there.

Me: “Hi! Welcome to the museum! How are you today?”

Man: “Fine, thanks. How are you?”

Me: “I’m doing well!”

Man: “No, you’re not.”

Me: *Confused* “I am doing well. It’s been a good day so far.”

Man: “You’re lying.”

I don’t really understand what he’s getting at, but I take the bait.

Me: “Why would you say that?”

Man: “Because all women are liars.”

I honestly don’t know what to say, so I remain silent with a slightly horrified expression.

The man gestures to his wife.

Man: “Well, she’s a liar.”

My horrified silence continues; I’m wondering how throwing his wife under the bus makes this any better. I think he thinks this is somehow a joke?

He gestures to his son.

Man: “Well, he’s a liar.”

At last, I find my voice.

Me: “I… I don’t think gender has anything to do with trustworthiness.”

Then, the man laughs in my face. It’s so incredibly and weirdly sexist that my soul leaves my body to go on customer service autopilot. I look at him with dead eyes and speak with an overly sugary sweet voice.

Me: “Would you like to make a donation to the museum?”

He seemed at least slightly sheepish about his weird, not-funny attempt at a joke and made a fairly large donation. For the sake of his family, I hope he’s not normally like that.