Cut Price Cut-Throats

(It is standard grooming salon policy to make sure the customer is completely satisfied with their dog’s haircut before they leave. If not, we will fix what we can. I am returning a dog to its owner.)

Me: “Here he is, ma’am! Are you happy with the haircut?”

Customer: *examining dog* “Hmm… well… he looks okay except for the hair above his eyes is still a little too long.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry about that. Would you like me to trim it a bit more? It’ll only take a minute.”

Customer: “No!”

Me: “Okay then, if you’re sure, that will be [price].”

Customer: “But that’s full price! You can’t charge me full price, because the hair above his eyes is too long!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I offered to trim it for you. I can still do that; it’ll just take a minute.”

Customer: “No!”

Me: “Well then, it’ll be the same price I just told you.”

Customer: “But that isn’t fair! The hair above his eyes is still too long! I want a discount!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’ve offered to fix the hair above his eyes for you, but you’ve refused. I cannot give you a discount for something that I am willing and able to fix right here and now.”

Customer: “Well, did I say too long? I meant it was too short! It’s too short! You can’t fix that now, can you!? I want a discount!”

(She proceeded to throw a tantrum for the next ten minutes and only paid up and left when I threatened to call the police on her. Needless to say, she and her dog are no longer welcome back.)