Cupid’s Arrow Doesn’t Always Fly Straight

| Romantic | July 22, 2013

(My coworker is a rather handsome guy. We work in a cosmetics store, and he is regularly hit on by both male and female customers, though is generally seen flirting with the girls. I see him profusely apologising to a rather angry looking woman, who then flounces out and walks off holding another man’s hand. As soon as she’s out of sight, he straightens up, stretches, and turns around with a self-satisfied grin plastered across his face.)

Me: “What are you so happy about?”

Coworker: “You know how my girlfriend works in an electronics store?”

Me: “…you have a girlfriend? Why are you always hitting on the girls that come in?”

Coworker: “Have you seen how much crap I sell to stupid girls that think buying stuff will make me want them? Anyway, my girlfriend works in an electronics store. She always has guys hitting on her for pretty much the same reason people hit on me. As we kept getting all these numbers, we came up with a plan to deal with them.”

(Two of our other coworkers, and a slightly disappointed looking customer have gathered around to listen.)

Coworker: “Basically, every few days we’ll call a few of the numbers and arrange dates with them around the city, sending one of mine and one of hers to the same place at the same time. Neither get the date they were planning on, but people feel like there’s a bond between them when they’re both stood up in the exact same manner. Then, sometimes, you get the ones like exhibit A…”

(My coworker gestures towards the door, where the rather angry looking woman has just left.)

Coworker: “These ones like to come back and rub it in your face that they found a better person when we didn’t turn up. It wouldn’t work if we told them what had happened, so we just act really apologetic.”

Coworker #2: “Holy s***, you’re running a dating service!”

Customer: *blushing* “Um… I don’t suppose you could do that for me?”

(My coworker takes her by the shoulder, and leads her towards some of the products.)

Coworker: “Of course I can. Let’s go and look like I’m selling you something while I do.”

(My co-worker gives the customer a bar and a time to turn up at. A couple of weeks later, the customer came back to give him a thank you card with her new boyfriend! There’s an ever growing number of couples out there who have no idea that my coworker and his girlfriend are the ones to thank for their relationship!)

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