Crushed To Death

(I’m having a random conversation with a girl who’s fond of me, and I’m kind of fond of too.)

Me: “I keep asking myself how you crushed so hard on me.”

Girl: “What do you mean?”

Me: “You’re smitten, and I don’t know why.”

Girl: “Because you’re wonderful.”

Me: “Wonderful enough to kill people over?”

Girl: “Ha ha. I don’t kill people.”

Me: “You won’t kill people threatening me?”

Girl: “I don’t know; I’ve never been asked that before. I’m not sure I could deal with killing someone. I might try my best to kick their a** though. Probably wouldn’t get very far; I’m not a fighter. I’ve never been in a fight in my life.”

Me: “That’s alright. As long as you can hire a hit-man, I’ll be happy.”