Crop Flop

I just came back from my break and the store is very busy. My manager is booking in a copy order and asks me to take over so she can help another customer. She explains to me that she is just printing a proof for him, printing his files 8.5×14 on 11×17 cardstock.

Me: “Oh, it looks like your files are sized to fit a full 11×17 page. If you want them 8.5×14, I will have to crop them.”

Customer: “I don’t want them 8.5×14.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, I thought that my manager told me you wanted the images to be 8.5×14. What size do you want them?”

Customer: “11×14.”

Me: “Okay, in that case, I will still have to crop them, since their dimensions fit an 11×17 page perfectly.”

Customer: “No, I sized them 11×14.”

Me: “Hmm, well, they’re not that size now.”

I show him on the screen, where his first image is taking up a full 11×17 page with no image distortion.

Customer: “That’s too big.”

Me: “Yes, it’s too long. I will have to crop the top and bottom if you want it to be 11×14.”

Customer: “No, you just stretched it; I saw you!”

Me: “I didn’t stretch it; I kept the proportions. I just made it bigger so that the width was 11 inches, like you wanted. But it’s too long so it will have to be cropped.”

Customer: “No, don’t make it any bigger! Just print it the way it is!”

Me: “Okay, I can do that, but it’s smaller than 11×14.”

Customer: “That’s what I want.”

Me: *Confused* “Um… okay. I’ll just put it on smaller paper, then.”

Customer: “Why?!“

Me: “Because if you don’t want me enlarging the photos, they will fit on 8.5×11 paper.”

Customer: “Did I ask for 8.5×11 paper?”

Me: “No, but you just told me that you didn’t want me to make your pictures bigger. And they’re small; they will fit on 8.5×11 paper.”

Customer: “I don’t want it on 8.5×11 paper! I want it on 11×17 paper!”

Me: “Okay, but it’s going to be more expensive for no reason.”

Customer: “I don’t care!“

After I print a few of his images, he stops me.

Customer: “No! This one’s wrong!”

Me: “What’s wrong with it?”

Customer: “It’s too small!”

Me: “I didn’t change anything. You told me not to make any of them bigger, so if it’s too small, it’s because you’ve sized it that way.”

Customer: “Ugh, fine, whatever. Just keep printing them.”