Crashed Diet

(A well-dressed woman and her teenage daughter are out to lunch at one of my tables. I have already brought them their drinks.)

Customer: *waving me over* “Miss! I asked for a diet soda.”

Me: “Oh, I’m so sorry. I must have picked up another server’s order by mistake. Let me get you a new one.”

(I fill a diet soda myself and deliver it. Before even tasting it, she speaks up.)

Customer: “No! This isn’t diet soda! I’m on a very strict diet and I can’t have carbs!”

Me: “I filled it myself. I assure you that it is diet.”

Customer: *poking the drink with a straw* “Then what are these? I can see the carbs everywhere!”

Me: “You can see the carbs, ma’am?”

Customer: “Yes! Are you blind? Can’t you see the bubbles?”

Customer’s Teenage Daughter: “Oh, my God, Mom! ‘Carbs’ mean carbohydrates, not carbonation!”

This story is part of the Children-Behaving-Better-Than-Their-Parents roundup!

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